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7 Ways to Get More Respect

Does it seem like people don’t listen to what you have to say? Do you feel ignored? Many people don’t receive the respect they either feel they deserve or would like. Unfortunately, once we train people to treat us a certain way, it’s challenging to change.

I’ve watched this trend happen to many people. I've coached people who feel this way. Now, I'm going to walk you through some techniques to get you the respect you hope for. Regardless of where you are now start by remembering this classic line, “where there’s a will, there’s a way.”

Use these techniques to get the respect you deserve:

1. Do what you say you’re going to do. We all know how challenging it can be to follow through on your proclamations, whether you agree to pick up someone at the airport or you’re trying to follow a diet.

  • We respect people that actually do the things they say they’re going to do. It shows reliability and self-control, both of which are worthy of anyone’s respect.

2. Live your values. When you know your values and live them, it’s clear to others that you have principles and follow them. It also makes it easier for you to make productive decisions and to advance your life.

  • There are many benefits to identifying your values and putting them into practice each and every day.

3. Call out disrespect when it happens. People can lose respect for you if they treat you poorly and you allow them to get away with it. Just seeing others get away with being disrespectful to you can cause them to lose respect.

  • Let others know that you don’t appreciate the treatment you’re receiving. Looking someone in the eye and telling them you’re displeased can be surprisingly powerful.

4. Speak up. Another mistake we often make in the name of being nice is allowing others to have their way. We’ll let others pick the restaurant, the movie, or the vacation location. When you act like everyone else’s opinion is more important than your own, people start to believe it’s actually true.

  • Give your opinion when it comes to what’s going on in your life. Act like your opinion matters, and people will realize that you matter, too.

5. Avoid over-apologizing. When you mess up, apologize. When you apologize too much, you appear weak. Weak people don’t receive a lot of respect in our society.

  • Don’t apologize for the music you listen to in your car, the fact that you only have water to drink in your house, or because an accident on the highway made you late.

  • When you don’t mess up or mistreat someone, it’s not your responsibility to apologize.

6. Work on your body language. Your body language can reveal more than your words. Keeping your head up, back straight, and maintaining good eye contact can make a huge difference.

● Movies can be a great way to learn about body language. Find a strong character and study them.

7. Consider the impression you make. Think about how you judge strangers in the grocery store. Imagine that you see one man with disheveled hair, a dirty t-shirt, flip flops, and 50 extra pounds. Your impression of him is very different that than of a man you see with a $90 haircut, a suit, a $300 pair of shoes, and a fit body.

● Consider what your appearance says to others. Do you look like the type of person that deserves respect?

This might seem shallow, but that doesn't mean it isn’t true. Do your best to look your best.

Few things feel worse than disrespect. We inadvertently teach others that they don’t have to respect us, so they don’t. However, we can teach them to treat us differently. Be a person that deserves respect and respect yourself enough to demand it from others. You can change how others view you.


Mike Acker

President & Lead Coach at ADVANCE

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