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Encouragement: The Best Tool for Building Your Child's Self-Confidence

As a parent, perhaps one of your biggest challenges is helping your child build self-confidence. While it may sound easy, it often takes a little more effort than we initially think.

Follow these tips to help boost your child's self confidence:

1. Encourage them to participate in an activity. Every child has hidden talents waiting to burst out; they just need exposure to activities they're good at so they can become more self-confident. Here's what you can do as a parent:

  • Have casual chats with your child to find out what his or her interests are.

  • Observe your child while playing outdoors and indoors, or watching TV (you can have an idea of the kind of programs that interest them.)

  • Encourage your child to join the soccer team or chess club, or do whatever activity they really enjoy.

2. Show your child affection. Children love to be loved and the more love you can show as a parent, the more confident your child will feel about his or her abilities and potential. Affection, appreciation, and love are the keys to boosting your child's confidence. Knowing you're loved will make anyone feel like they have the potential to do anything!

  • Play with them outdoors or even when they're playing video games inside.

  • Ask for help with something you're doing and express true appreciation for the assistance they provide.

  • Hug them, kiss them, and say: "I love you" whenever you get the chance.

3. Teach them to make their own decisions. One of the best ways to help boost your child's self-confidence is encouraging them to make their own healthy decisions. Kids rely on parents for guidance, which is good, but it sometimes makes them doubtful of their own abilities to make decisions. You could perhaps:

  • Get them involved in choosing the subjects they want to study at school.

  • Take them along on grocery day so they can have a hand in choosing healthy foods.

  • Teach them how to identify positive traits in people and let them choose their friends accordingly.

4. Ask for help with chores at home. Getting your young one involved in at-home activities like household chores, gardening, and even washing the car can teach them responsibility. Having responsibility assigned to them can make them feel important and subsequently self-confident. They'll probably start thinking to themselves:

  • "I mow the lawn at home and I'm good at it!"

  • "Mom wants me to dry the dishes, which means she thinks I do a great job!"

  • "Dad must think I'm responsible because he asks me to walk the dog everyday!"

5. Avoid getting upset about failures. As opposed to cursing and expressing disappointment when your child gets a low grade or doesn't score a goal in a soccer match, why not encourage them instead? At the end of the day, all a child really wants is to know their parents are proud of them. Show your pride, love, and trust by:

  • Encouraging them to keep trying at that math formula until they get it right.

  • Giving them advice and tips on how to score a goal.

  • Taking them for a treat after a loss or failure so they feel renewed to try harder next time.

Raising a child is anything but easy and raising well-adjusted, self-confident children just adds all sorts of challenges to the mix! However, the more you encourage your child, the more likely they'll display confidence and the desire to pursue their own goals and challenges.


Thank you for reading our blog!

- Mike Acker

Check out my new book on Public Speaking: Speak with Confidence, published by WILEY.

A breakthrough to develop confidence in speaking, leadership, and life. A follow-up book to my best-selling book, Speak with No Fear

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